American Music Awards: a running commentary
8:08pm - Damn! Carrie Underwood has amazing legs. I am inspired to hit the gym! Did you see Faith Hill's reaction to Underwood winning the Country Music Award a coupla' weeks ago?
8:14pm - Okay, they just ran through all of tonight's nominees and I've never even heard of 5 of them. 5!! I work in the industry, get press releases and news headlines in my inbox daily - there are few names in any genre that I don't at least recognize. 5?? Only one appeared to be country - that's my weakest area of contemporary musical knowledge. 5. This year really needs some superstars - the market is way too diluted.
8:21pm - Um... I'm so sorry to report that Nickelback won the award for Favorite Pop/Rock Album. It was between them, the Chili Peppers, and High School Musical. Ha! I repeat my final comment from the previous time slot. Have you all heard that recording someone placed online of the two Nickelback songs playing simultaneously, one from each speaker? Dudes, they're the same. ALL their songs are the same! They found a formula and they're sticking with it - and we're giving them awards for it! Sheesh. I mean, yeah, the Chilis sound like they're doing the same thing as ever these days, but at least their songs, if not the era in which each was created/recorded, are distinguishable from one another. At least they're making cool, fun videos. At least they're poetic and creative still, at least to some extent. Nickelback. Puhleeeez.
Ha! I can't find the link to the Nickelback Sucks mp3 - they took it down or something. Shoot! BUT... I found a similar experiement with Linkin Park songs. It's not as good, but same point:
All Linkin Park songs are the same!
If ayone knows where I can get the Nickelback mp3, please lemme know, 'kay?
8:30pm - Josh Groban. My mom loves him. I half expect her to call and ask if I'm watching right now.
8:41pm - Ally & AJ? One of the "groups" I have never heard of. Whoa! Nelly Furtado is looking frighteninglly like Penelope Cruz, yeah? She has a guy performing with her who appears to have no other job but to go "Be Do Be Doop! Ha ha ha ha! Wicky Wicky!" I could totally do that. I wonder what he's getting paid?
8:53pm - Snow Patrol are going the way of Coldplay. They were pretty awesome when they first came out, but they've become so boring and adult contemporary. What is it about popularity and platinum sales that make bands so boring?
9:03pm - Gwen does Sound of Music! What is it with all the cleopatra-style wigs tonight?
9:11pm - best Pop/Rock band = Red Hot Chili Peppers.
9:25pm - Dixie Chicks. I don't love country music, but I'm so glad to know that not every country hick (it's a joke. calm down! Don't make me go off on you hecklers Michael Richards-style) is an ignorant Bush-lover.
and since I brought it up:
9:36pm - Mmmmmmmm... Dave Grohl. Could he be any hotter? Could Jack Black be any more slobby? And yet, I find myself strangely attracted to him...
9:50pm - awww yeah. Lionel Richie. Please, please, please play something classic... eh, no such luck. Doesn't exactly have me dancing on the ceiling. Oh, wait! Here it is! YESSSSS! All Night Long - just the way I like it!
9:57pm - I don't think Babyface could have been any less enthused about introducing Fallout Boy (Fall Out Boy?). I hate to admit it, but I'm starting to buy into them. I still think their earlier stuff was typical Warped fare - I don't think I missed anything back then. But I do think that unlike many of their peers, they're really starting to develop into a rock band with a little staying power. And they're movin beyond the formulaic post-punk teenage fodder and insincere displays of energy at the wrong points in songs. I give them another 2 albums - one experimental flop followed by a strong, matured comeback - and they'll have me convinced.
But I do really like this one:
10:06pm - Breakthrough Artist: Carrie Underwood. Her fellow nominees: Pussycat Dolls and Chamillionaire. I'd like to know through what these artists broke?
10:08pm - *singing along* life is a hiiiighwaaaaayyyy
10:12pm - okay, I get the whole Ray thing, but why does Jamie Foxx have to act blind every time he sits at a piano?
10:18pm - T•Mobile users like Rascal Flatts best. I'm on Verizon. We like cool artists best. Like the ones I'm gonna celebrate New Years Eve with: The Flaming Lips and Gnarls Barkley! I'm on a mission to be one of the animal people on stage for the Flaming Lips portion of the show. We'll keep you posted how that goes!
10:27pm - ha! Linkin Park are presenting! I'm psychic! The announcer just made some ridiculous comment about them moving into the mainstream... where does he think they've been??
10:36pm - When did John Mayer go from someone my mom would like to someone my dad would like?
10:46pm - Who's Acorn?No clue. But he taught me something very important tonight: rappers like strippers and cash-money. Oh wait... I knew that. But I still don't know who he is.
10:51pm - someone's gonna poke an eye out with these awards.
10:56pm - and... that's it. The end of these shows is always so unrewarding. They start with the big show and end with a guy talking. It's kinda' backwards if you ask me. Give us a big finale! Madonna kissing Brittney, Snoop kissing Jimmy Kimmel, and Fallout Boy (Fall Out Boy?) kissing monkeys! Dave Grohl, Tenacious D, and the Chili Peppers (viz Satellite) as Fergie's backup dancers! YES! Jack Black working the pole. That's how it should end.
8:14pm - Okay, they just ran through all of tonight's nominees and I've never even heard of 5 of them. 5!! I work in the industry, get press releases and news headlines in my inbox daily - there are few names in any genre that I don't at least recognize. 5?? Only one appeared to be country - that's my weakest area of contemporary musical knowledge. 5. This year really needs some superstars - the market is way too diluted.
8:21pm - Um... I'm so sorry to report that Nickelback won the award for Favorite Pop/Rock Album. It was between them, the Chili Peppers, and High School Musical. Ha! I repeat my final comment from the previous time slot. Have you all heard that recording someone placed online of the two Nickelback songs playing simultaneously, one from each speaker? Dudes, they're the same. ALL their songs are the same! They found a formula and they're sticking with it - and we're giving them awards for it! Sheesh. I mean, yeah, the Chilis sound like they're doing the same thing as ever these days, but at least their songs, if not the era in which each was created/recorded, are distinguishable from one another. At least they're making cool, fun videos. At least they're poetic and creative still, at least to some extent. Nickelback. Puhleeeez.
Ha! I can't find the link to the Nickelback Sucks mp3 - they took it down or something. Shoot! BUT... I found a similar experiement with Linkin Park songs. It's not as good, but same point:
All Linkin Park songs are the same!
If ayone knows where I can get the Nickelback mp3, please lemme know, 'kay?
8:30pm - Josh Groban. My mom loves him. I half expect her to call and ask if I'm watching right now.
8:41pm - Ally & AJ? One of the "groups" I have never heard of. Whoa! Nelly Furtado is looking frighteninglly like Penelope Cruz, yeah? She has a guy performing with her who appears to have no other job but to go "Be Do Be Doop! Ha ha ha ha! Wicky Wicky!" I could totally do that. I wonder what he's getting paid?
8:53pm - Snow Patrol are going the way of Coldplay. They were pretty awesome when they first came out, but they've become so boring and adult contemporary. What is it about popularity and platinum sales that make bands so boring?
9:03pm - Gwen does Sound of Music! What is it with all the cleopatra-style wigs tonight?
9:11pm - best Pop/Rock band = Red Hot Chili Peppers.
9:25pm - Dixie Chicks. I don't love country music, but I'm so glad to know that not every country hick (it's a joke. calm down! Don't make me go off on you hecklers Michael Richards-style) is an ignorant Bush-lover.
and since I brought it up:
9:36pm - Mmmmmmmm... Dave Grohl. Could he be any hotter? Could Jack Black be any more slobby? And yet, I find myself strangely attracted to him...
9:50pm - awww yeah. Lionel Richie. Please, please, please play something classic... eh, no such luck. Doesn't exactly have me dancing on the ceiling. Oh, wait! Here it is! YESSSSS! All Night Long - just the way I like it!
9:57pm - I don't think Babyface could have been any less enthused about introducing Fallout Boy (Fall Out Boy?). I hate to admit it, but I'm starting to buy into them. I still think their earlier stuff was typical Warped fare - I don't think I missed anything back then. But I do think that unlike many of their peers, they're really starting to develop into a rock band with a little staying power. And they're movin beyond the formulaic post-punk teenage fodder and insincere displays of energy at the wrong points in songs. I give them another 2 albums - one experimental flop followed by a strong, matured comeback - and they'll have me convinced.
But I do really like this one:
10:06pm - Breakthrough Artist: Carrie Underwood. Her fellow nominees: Pussycat Dolls and Chamillionaire. I'd like to know through what these artists broke?
10:08pm - *singing along* life is a hiiiighwaaaaayyyy
10:12pm - okay, I get the whole Ray thing, but why does Jamie Foxx have to act blind every time he sits at a piano?
10:18pm - T•Mobile users like Rascal Flatts best. I'm on Verizon. We like cool artists best. Like the ones I'm gonna celebrate New Years Eve with: The Flaming Lips and Gnarls Barkley! I'm on a mission to be one of the animal people on stage for the Flaming Lips portion of the show. We'll keep you posted how that goes!
10:27pm - ha! Linkin Park are presenting! I'm psychic! The announcer just made some ridiculous comment about them moving into the mainstream... where does he think they've been??
10:36pm - When did John Mayer go from someone my mom would like to someone my dad would like?
10:46pm - Who's Acorn?No clue. But he taught me something very important tonight: rappers like strippers and cash-money. Oh wait... I knew that. But I still don't know who he is.
10:51pm - someone's gonna poke an eye out with these awards.
10:56pm - and... that's it. The end of these shows is always so unrewarding. They start with the big show and end with a guy talking. It's kinda' backwards if you ask me. Give us a big finale! Madonna kissing Brittney, Snoop kissing Jimmy Kimmel, and Fallout Boy (Fall Out Boy?) kissing monkeys! Dave Grohl, Tenacious D, and the Chili Peppers (viz Satellite) as Fergie's backup dancers! YES! Jack Black working the pole. That's how it should end.
posted by Shameless at 8:31 PM
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